When I entered graduate school, we did an exercise to demonstrate privilege within our cohort. We began by standing in a straight line, holding hands with one another. Our shoulders pressed together, trying to accommodate seventy bodies between two walls. Our professor began to read out statements, and if the statement was “true” to our […]
How we define family may depend on our circumstances and, in whatever form, having people in our life that we consider family is important to our basic survival and overall well-being. According to a 2008 report by the Pew Research Center, 57% of American adults haven’t left the state that they grew up in and […]
The more we understand about neurobiology and social psychology, the more we understand that humans are wired to connect. Turns out Professor Maslow didn’t have it quite right when he designed his famous five-tiered hierarchy of needs (Fig 1), assuming that our physiological needs were more important to our survival than affection and love. The […]
Have you been feeling stressed lately? You’re certainly not alone. We are going through something on a global scale that is completely unprecedented…and it is connecting us in new ways. Experts tell us that what we are experiencing is a “collective trauma:” A situation that “violates the familiar ideas and expectations about the world […]
I opened my inbox recently and amongst the mostly commercial emails, I found a communication from a friend of mine. It was an appreciation. “You took the time out to listen to what was going on with me and I wanted you to know how much I appreciate that…You are always so positive…I went to […]
What do you tell yourself about who you are inside your head? Do you whisper the words of a lover to their beloved? Or are your words harsh and critical? Do the words land gently as a soft blanket? Or are they harshly thrown down and prickly, leaving you feeling distraught? Much of our internal […]
My husband Mark and I have been married for five years. Along the way, we’ve discovered that humor is an excellent way to ease tension. For example, it’s not uncommon for me to playfully chastise my beloved for ‘failing to read my mind…again’. Using my most incredulous tone, I exclaim something like, “I mean, it’s […]
A year ago, I moved to Maine with my husband. There were many things about the move that I expected, such as the stress of starting a new job, or the strain of being across the country from my family. What I didn’t expect were the ways in which our move would shake up my […]
It was about a year ago that everything in my marriage began to change. My husband started a new job, which required that he work the overnight shift. Suddenly, we were co-existing in opposite worlds. He would return, tired from a long night at work, just as I was rising to put the coffee on. […]
As a community, we are becoming better at sexual health and consent negotiations. To my surprise, ‘intent’ is rarely part of the conversation. Perhaps it should be. When talking to a new, potential intimate partner, a script is starting to develop around how the conversations go ahead of an interaction. The conversation usually includes consent […]